


Chat Accidentally Gets A Boyfriend

by ChurchOfApathy



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Bisexual Adrien Agreste, Coming Out, Flirting, Getting Together, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-26
Updated: 2017-07-26
Packaged: 2018-11-28 18:53:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,096
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11424030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChurchOfApathy/pseuds/ChurchOfApathy
Summary: Based on Thescuttlebugg on tumblr's prompt. Go check them out, they're awesome.This is basically the story of how Adrien realised he could flirt with whoever the fuck he wants as Chat Noir without outing Adrien as bisexual. So he flirts with EVERYONE as Chat Noir. Nino decides to flirt back and wham bam Chat Noir suddenly has a boyfriend.Chat Noir has a boyfriend. Who he has to see every day in class. And sit next to. And be best friends with. And NOT BE BOYFRIEND-LY TO.… mistakes were made.





	Chat Accidentally Gets A Boyfriend

**Author's Note:**

  * For [thescuttlebugg](https://archiveofourown.org/users/thescuttlebugg/gifts).



\----

Adrien Agreste was reclined on the couch in his room, phone in hand. He was scrolling through his tumblr feed, which mostly consisted of Ladybug-related posts, some Chat Noir stuff, puns, bad jokes, lots of cat photos, and whatever fucked up shit Nino had recently reblogged. 

Today the ‘fucked up shut Nino had reblogged’ wasn’t that fucked up. There were some new tracks Nino had posted, all engenius, as usual. There was also a blurry photo of Ladybug leaping from roof to roof. The DJ had spotted (Pun intended.) her a few nights back after an akuma attack.

The thing that stood out to Adrien the most, however, was a certain image set Nino had reblogged. It was a set of photos, each with a LGBT+ pride flag on it and different phrases on each photo. 

The gay pride flag said, “Be proud.” The trans flag said “Be who you are.” the asexual flag said, “Don’t hide.” The bisexual flag said, “Come out.” ...and so forth.

Plagg, whom had been eating some disgusting smelling camembert while sitting on Adrien’s shoulder, finally decided to speak up when he noticed the blonde staring at the photos.

“Are you ever gonna come out?” He asked without prompting.

Adrien made a noise that definitely was not a squeak, although Plagg would tell you otherwise. “What?!” Adrien asked, looking slightly panicked.

“Relax kid. I’ve known for ages.” Plagg rolled his eyes.

“How?!” Then as an afterthought, “...Am I that obvious?!”

“Only to people who spend every minute of every day with you.” Plagg sounded annoyed.

“S-so, no one else knows?” Adrien asked, slowly relaxing again. He still looked semi-tense.

“How would I know? You’re the only human I’m allowed to talk to.” Plagg droned.

“R-right. So how did you figure me out?” Adrien asked out of curiosity.

“I’ve met gay people before, kid. Two Chat Noir's ago, both Ladybug and chat where girls and they went at it every single night, I swear to me, they were like wild animals the way they-”

“Okay! I don’t need to know anymore about that subject!” Adrien nearly shouted, cringing. “Over sharing, Plagg, TMI.”

Plagg only shrugged and finished off his cheese. “So seriously, are you ever gonna come out or are you making a nice cozy home in that closet of your’s?”

“I… I’m not sure I can come out.” Adrien sighed, slouching into the couch cushions.

“Cause your dad’s an asshole?” 

“He’s not a-! Okay, he… he kinda is, but…” Adrien groaned. “I dunno Plagg. I’m not sure he’d react well to me being Bisexual.”

“He’s a fashion icon. Not to stereotype but I’m sure he’s either dabbled in the gay ways himself or met people who have.” Plagg pointed out.

“I don’t wanna risk it.” Adrien sighed.

Plagg’s expression softened. “I’m not gonna push you to do anything you’re not comfortable with kid-”

“You mean besides putting on a skin tight leather catsuit and parading around Paris to fight an evil supervillain?”

Plagg waved him off. “That’s besides the point. If you’re not ready, then you’re not ready. You have my support kid.”

Adrien allowed himself to smile a bit. “Thanks Plagg.”

“No problem.” 

Adrien shrugged. “I guess it doesn’t matter much right now anyway. Dad doesn’t even let me date, so it’s not like I’m about to go get a boyfriend or girlfriend right this minute… Although it would be nice to openly flirt with whoever I want…”

“You realize you can flirt with whoever the fuck you want as Chat Noir, right? No one’s gonna stop you and your dad never has to know.” Plagg points out helpfully.

Adrien’s eyes widened. “Oh my god you’re right. Ladybug doesn’t take me serious anyway, and it doesn’t matter what anyone thinks if Chat Noir flirts with anything that moves! And… fuck it, I’m fifteen, I wanna kiss people and… stuff.”

Plagg gave him a look. “Wait, what’s and stuff mean cause you're only fifteen kid, I might have to draw a line somewhere. I will not endure a repeat of the other gay Chat. No. Not again.”

“Chill, Plagg. I meant like date stuff, flirting, stuff like that.” Adrien clarified.

Plagg visibly relaxed. “Good.”

“You know what?” Adrien sat up, placing both hands on his hips.

“I’m gonna regret asking.... What?” Plagg said with dread lacing his voice.

“Next time there’s an akuma attack, I’m gonna flirt with the first cute boy I see.” Adrien declares. “Besides, it’ll be good to get some practice in for when father finally allows me to date.”

Plagg gave him a slightly impressed look. “Good for you kid. Now get me more cheese.”

“You just ate!”

\----

The next akuma attack didn't take place until two days later. Some little girl got rightfully pissed about her parents favoritism towards her brother. She started turning every boy she saw into a girl. Luckily for the men of Paris, Ladybug’s Miraculous Cure put everything back to normal, as always. 

As Chat watched several girls be turned back into boys, he found himself a target in the form of a rather cute teenage boy. He had light brown skin and a shaved head. He was shorter than Chat and was wearing a green plaid shirt with skinny jeans.

Chat moved in for the kill. He circled the boy in an almost predatory way, eyes bright and seductive. “Well aren’t you a handsome fella…” Chat started in a low tone.

“W-what?” The boy stammered, already getting flustered.

“Can I pawther you for a kiss or would you purfur dinner and a movie furst?” Chat asked, loading on as many cat puns as he can think of.

Adrien totally did not practice this line in the mirror. Don’t believe everything Plagg tells you. He is the devil disguised as a floating cat.

The boy blushed bright red. “Are you flirting with me?”

“That depends entirely on if it’s working.” Chat answered seriously.

“It’s not, I’m not gay.” The frowned slightly. “B-but thank you for saving Paris and all that…”

Chat leaned back and out of the boy’s space. “Oh, that’s too bad, you’re cute… Alright see ya around kid.” Chat excused himself, walking back towards Ladybug, who was looking at him weird.

“We’re you just flirting with that kid?” She asked in shock.

“Uh, yes? What did it look like I was doing?” Chat pouted slightly.

“Flirting.” 

“Oh, good.”

“I didn’t know you liked guys.” Ladybug commented, obviously confused.

Chat tensed a bit. “Is… Is that gonna be a problem?”

Ladybug immediately waved him off. “Please, Kitty, I wouldn’t let something so trivial come between us. Besides, I’m a wholehearted LGBT supporter.” She shot him a smile.

Chat immensely relaxed and returned the gesture. “Good to know.” 

“So why haven't I see you flirting up any guys in the past?” Shae asked out of curiosity.

Chat chuckled nervously. “Eh… Well I was worried about my dad finding out so I tried to stay away from flirting with guys but then my kawami reminded me that if I do all my firsting as Chat Noir, my dad never has to know!” He laughed.

Ladybug nodded. “Clever Kitty… Well, you have my full support!” She declared.

“Thanks LB.” They hugged.

As Chat pulled away, a certain reporter ran up, shoving her phone into his face. Chat immediately realised she was recording and mentally reminded himself to watch what he says.

“Chat Noir, were you just flirting with that young man? What’s the deal? Do you like guys?” She spat out question after question.

Ladybug opened her mouth to answer for him, but Chat grabbed her arm. “I got this.” He assured the spotted hero. “I prepared for this exact situation.”

“What do you mean?” Alya asked.

Chat unzipped his pocket and pulled out a sheet of stickers. “Gimme your hand, Alya.”

Alya did as she was told and Chat peeled a sticker off the sheet before pressing it onto Alya’s hand. “Tada!” Chat said proudly gesturing to her sticker.

It was a picture of a black cat wearing a bixesual flag as a cape. “I had to special order these offline but I’m so glad I did, aren’t they the literal best?!” Chat gushed proudly.

That adorable.” Alya concluded.

“Absolutely pawsome.” Ladybug agreed. Chat beamed at her cat pun.

Ayla turned her camera back to Chat. “So does this mean you’re coming out as bisexual?”

“Yep.” Chat nodded. “..but only because I can’t do it at home. I figured, what’s the point of having an alter ego if I can't even come out?”

\----

Within a week the quote, “What’s the point of having an alter ego if I can’t even come out?” is literally everywhere. Tumblr has exploded. Chat is on the cover of every newspaper, the headline for every article, and the topic on everyone’s minds. Overnight Chat Noir became the most popular gay icon in all of France, and Chat fucking loves it.

His flirting has gotten more and more over the top in the past week. He once bought a dozen roses for an akuma victim, then the next day he proposed to some random girl in the street with a ring pop and when she declined he proposed to the first guy he saw. Meanwhile, Ladybug finds this entire thing hilarious and tumblr just can’t get enough.

A few days ago he managed to flirt with Alya, Marinette, Kim, Nathaniel and Max all at once. Yesterday he flirted with Alix and Rose, today he flirted with Ivan. Chat is slowing making his way through the class.

Adrien was currently on his computer in his bedroom, Plagg was eating cheese on the desk beside him. His tumblr feed was still cluttered with Bisexual Chat posts. I was pretty entertaining to see, a huge ego boost too. 

“This is awesome Plagg, I can flirt with literally anyone as Chat and all it does it make tumblr explode all over again! No one cares, no one knows it’s me, it’s perfect! I’ve already flirted with over half the class, hell, I could flirt with, I dunno, Nino if I wanted to!” Adrien laughed wholeheartedly. 

Plagg glanced up from his camembert to give Adrien a skeptical look. “Do you really think flirting with your best friend is wise?”

Adrien wiggles his eyebrows at Plagg and grinned. “That sounds like a challenge.”

“No. Absolutely not.” Plagg deadpans. “This will only end in heartbreak.”

“I’m gonna do it anyway.”

“God dammit kid, you’re gonna be the death of me.”

\----

Four days later there’s an akuma attack at school in the courtyard. Some poor janitor got fired for god knows what and started cleaning the school of children instead of trash. Although in Chloe’s case that’s kinda the same thing.

Ladybug and chat Noir managed to wrap it up rather quickly, and without the use of Lucky Charm or Cataclysm. He was kinda a weak akuma.  
Almost immediately after Ladybug cleansed the akuma, Chat spotted Nino watching them from the sidelines.

Chat put on cheshire grin and strutted over. He leaned in a bit, invading Nino’s personal space. “So listen, Nino, I really value my breath, and I’m gonna need you to stop taking it away every time you walk past.”

Nino’s eyes bugged out of his skull as he realised what was happening, Chat Noir was flirting with him? Just wow. He quickly regains his composure and leans in so he and Chat are only a few inches apart. He puts on the most flirty look he can and asks in a low, very sexual tone, “Oh really? I’ll make you a deal kitty, if you let me steal a kiss instead I’ll stop stealing your breath.”  
Chat raises an eyebrow at him in surprise and gives Nino a look like, ‘Oh, you wanna go?’ Chat puts on a smirk and purrs, “Oh but that’ll just make it worse, how am I supposed to concentrate on saving Paris if I’m thinking about those pretty little lips of your’s?”

Somewhere in the back of his mind Chat reminded himself that this is all pretend and that Nino is his best friend and nothing more. However, something in the front of his mind told the back of his mind to shut the fuck up and let this pan out.

“Simple…” Nino responds, “Save Paris and I’ll reward you with a lot more than a few kisses, how about you focus on that, Kitten?” Did Nino just move closer? Chat thinks he moved closer.

“Now that is some top of the line motivation, Nino, I hope you can follow through on that promise because it sure is a tempting offer.” Chat replies smoothly.

“If it’s so tempting why don’t you just give in?” Yep, that time nino definitely moved closer, he’s sure of it. They’re barely an inch apart now, the sexual tension is high. 

Chat finds himself leaning in even closer, going in for a kiss when instead of soft lips he finds a piece of paper pressed to his lips. Chat gives Nino a look of surprise. 

“My number.” Nino answers shortly. “Use it.”

Chat watches Nino turn around and leave without another word. Chat’s too busy processing what just happened. He nearly kissed his best friend, he flirted with his best friend, who then gave him his number!? 

Chat is almost certain his face is bright red when Ladybug comes up behind him. She crosses her arms and gives Chat an amused look.

“So…” She starts. “Who won your little flirt-battle?”

“He did.” Chat answers without hesitation. “Definitely him, but I got the prize.” Chat flashed her the phone number with a prideful grin.

\----

It’s been two weeks since Chat noir sorta accidentally got himself a boyfriend by the name of Nino Lahiffe and boy has it been a roller coaster of emotions.

On one hand, Chat gets to show up in the middle of the night for spontaneous make out sessions, cuddling, kisses, and they curl up under the blankets and play video games and Nino kicks his ass at it every time but that’s okay because Nino gets this adorable little victory face. Plus there's lots of very intense flirting.

However, on the other hand, Adrien has a boyfriend that he can’t tell anyone about. Who he has to see every day in class. And sit next to. And be best friends with. And NOT BE BOYFRIEND-LY TO. 

Chat is in heaven and Adrien is in hell.

Mistakes were made. Adrien accidently called Nino babe twice, tried to hold his hand, and has been resisting kissing Nino in the middle of class to the best of his ability. Adrien has caught himself staring longingly at his wonderful boyfriend in the middle of class. He’s been so tempted to just tell Nino his true identity so they don’t have to jump through all the hoops.

However, Adrien knows Nino is safer in the dark, so he says nothing on the topic of secret identities.

Today, however, Adrien is in a special kind of hell. Nino won’t stop talking about Chat Noir. They’re at lunch, sitting with Alya and Mari while Nino gushes about his boyfriend.

More specifically, Nino is gushing about how hot his boyfriend is.

“And bro, he is so hot, I cannot even explain how hot he is unless you’ve seen him up close and personal, it’s ridiculous. And also he blushes like a peach and is so easy to fluster and somehow that makes him even hotter!?” Nino says excitedly. Mari look amused more than anything, Alya is eating up every word Nino speaks about Chat Noir, and Adrien….

Adrien is nodding along like a good and supportive and very platonic friend, staring past Nino’s shoulder and internally screaming the whole time. 

It doesn’t help that Alya asks the most insanely personal questions about their relationship. If Adrien has to hear her ask Nino how big Cat Noir’s dick is one more time he’ll snap.

“Yeah, so anyway to answer your question Alya, I’d totally lick Chat’s abs if he’d let me.”

Adrien spits out his drink and makes a mental note to pay more attention to what they’re talking about so he doesn’t get caught off guard like that again. He also makes another mental note about letting Nino lick his abs.

“Woah, you okay there Adrien?” Alya asks.

“Dude, what was that?” Nino asks.

“N-nothing. I’m fine. It just went down the wrong pipe.” He lies as he wipes milk off his chin.

Nino sighs and grabs napkin. “Hold still.” He demands before wiping milk off Adrien’s chin for him. He’s so close. Adrien wants to either scream or kiss him. He can’t decide which.

Nino pulls away and smiles at him. “There, much better.” Nino hops up and throws out the napkin before returning to their lunch table. “So are we still on for today, Adrien?”

“On for what?” Adrien asks, still slightly dazed by Nino being so close.

“I was gonna come over so we could play video games, remember?” Nino reminds him.

Oh no. If Adrien has to sit through a few hours of Nino telling him how hot he is Adrien will not survive. He’s so screwed.

“Uh, right, yeah. I nearly forgot. Sorry.” Adrien chuckles nervously. Adrien is in hell.

A few hours full of sexual tension later, the bell for dismissal finally rings and the moment Nino steps outside the school he’s scooped up in the arms of a certain leather clad cat.

“Holy shit!” Nino gasps as he finds himself flying through the arm, carried bridal style by Chat Noir.

“Hey Nino.” Chat greets calmly. He has a serious expression on his face.

“Uh… Not that I’m not into this but actually I had plans with my buddy Adrien this afternoon.” Nino says awkwardly.

“I’m sure he’ll understand!”

\----

The next morning Adrien waits for his boyfriend outside the school so they can walk to class together. As soon as Nino spots him he comes running up. “I’m so sorry I had to ditch on our hangout, man, Chat wanted to have an ‘emergency makeout session’ as he called it.”

“Oh no, I totally understand dude. It’s fine. I encourage you to make out with your boyfriend… and lick his abs.” Adrien said seriously.

Nino scoffed. “So no hard feelings?”

“Nope.” Adrien assured him with a grin.

“Thanks dude, you’re the best.” Nino laughed. “Hey, I should totally introduce you to Chat some day, I feel like you two would get along great.”  
Adrien pat Nino on the back. “You have no idea.”

**Author's Note:**

> YES. That's REALLY how I'm ending the story. This is fic is DONE. COMPLETE. OVER.


End file.
